AI Top Ten: Don't Speak, And Don't EVER Wear That Hairstyle Again!

When I originally heard that Gwen Stefani was going to be one of the "mentors" on this season's American Idol, I gave the show some kudos for upping the hip factor among its guests/mentors/whatever you want to call them. (I mean, Barry Manilow? Lionel Richie? Come on...) But, then I began to wonder how you could do an entire "Gwen Stefani/No Doubt Night" show. Well, the powers that be at the show avoided that limitation by making it a "Gwen Stefani And All The Artists That Have Inspired Her Night". That at least gave the finalists more songs to choose from, though I don't know how much that helped some of them. Here's how I would rank last night's performances:


1. Melinda Dolittle - Donna Summer inspires Gwen Stefani? Interesting. Melinda's vocals on "Heaven Knows" were strong and solid as expected. Plus, it was nice to see her do an up-tempo number again. I just wish she'd be more adventurous in her song choices. I mean, are we going to hear her do divas' songs for the entire season? Still, it was the best performance of the night. Grade: A

2. LaKisha Jones - Yes, "Last Dance" has been done by two previous contestants, but so what? LaKisha's version was far, far stronger than the renditions done by either Brenna Gethers or Ryan Starr. After last week's "Diamonds Are Forever", this was a very good song choice for her. And, as Simon mentioned in his critique, she seemed 30 years younger than last week as well. Grade: A

3. Gina Glocksen - Yes, I'm surprised I'm placing Gina this high, but her take on "I'll Stand By You" was a perfect song choice and was indeed, her best performance so far (and was one of the best of the whole night). If (and I know it's a big "if") she could keep her singing at this level, she could last longer in this competition than I originally thought. As someone mentioned in another article I read, she had this unexpected confidence about her that could turn her into a possible darkhorse. Grade: B+/B

4. Phil Stacey - An unexpectedly good performance from Phil last night. "Every Breath You Take" was a good song choice for him. He was able to show off his strong voice without having to yell the song (as he has the last the last couple of weeks). I still can't get past the fact that he looks like the love child of Boy George and Uncle Fester, though. Grade: B

5. Jordin Sparks - It was nice to see Jordin do an up-tempo, fun song this week after her powerhouse ballad last week. But, I don't know if No Doubt's "Hey Baby" was the best choice for her, as I don't think it translated all that well to the American Idol stage. But, I'll give her bonus points for taking a big risk by choosing the song and, for the most part, succeeding. Just don't get me started on her outfit last night. Grade: B

6. Blake Lewis - Blake put his own unique twist on another song this week (The Cure's "Love Song") and came out smelling like a rose. I agree with Randy and Simon, though, as I thought the performance bordered on being a bit bland and boring. Boring or not, Blake's not in trouble and will most definitely be around to sing another week. Grade: B/B-

7. Chris Robinson - It's not that his take on No Doubt's "Don't Speak" was all that bad; I just didn't think it was anything to write home about. To borrow a line from Randy, it was just "aight" for me. Once again this week, he messed up part of the lyrics, but either the judges didn't catch it or they decided to give him a pass on it. I don't think Chris is in danger this week, but I'm ready for him to "kick it up a notch", as Emeril would say. Grade: B-/C+

8. Hayley Scarnato - I agree with Simon and Randy yet again, as I also thought Hayley's rendition of Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors" was largely forgettable. If Hayley doesn't go this week, she'll really need to knock it out of the park next week. But, I'm afraid she may not have that chance. Hayley's true colors, I'm afraid, are more suited for a pageant somewhere than this competition. Grade: C

9. Chris Sligh - The Police's "Every Little Thing She Does" was a good choice of song, but he was behind (or was he ahead?) of the beat the entire time, as Gwen predicted he would be. This guy is really fading fast, and I'm afraid he make visit the Bottom Three for the first time this week. Grade: C/C-

10. Sanjaya Malakar - Yet again, I agree with Simon. I think Sanjaya's in his own world at this point, and I don't think it matters what the judges say about his performances anymore. I was cruelly hoping he'd do Gwen's "Hollaback Girl"; I mean, he has the hair for it, anyway. (And what the HELL was up with that ponyhawk, fauxhawk, or whatever you want to call it? The hairstylist who helped Sanjaya come up with that should be taken out back and shot...) But, he chooses to do No Doubt's "Bathwater" instead, and I'm stuck with images of Sanjaya splashing around in a bathtub now. Eww. The performance itself? Once again, it was far weaker than the rest of the finalists, but, at this point, does that really matter? Grade: D+

Best of the night: Melinda
Worst of the night: Sanjaya
Who should/will be in the Bottom Three: Chris S., Hayley, Sanjaya
Who SHOULD go home this week: Sanjaya
Who WILL go home this week: Hayley (though Chris S. wouldn't be a total shock...)